By Natasha T. Brown
Our lives are a constant negotiation process – what to eat, who’s going to cook it, where to work, who to work with, who will do what, is the event worth our time, should this person be involved, how much is the deal worth, should I ask for more? Almost everything within reason is negotiable, if you believe it and if you believe you have the power to negotiate. A letter comes in the mail from a credit card company informing you that you must pay your balance by a certain date: do you call the credit card company to negotiate a later date or a lower payment? Did you even believe you had the power to do so? Most people believe what they read in black and white, without believing they have the power to negotiate a better option. The amount of power you believe you have is the amount of power you have.
This week, let’s discuss “How to Negotiate like a Winner,” using the key points from one of my favorite books, You Can Negotiate Anything, by Herb Cohen. The advice shared here can be used for almost any situation and myself and millions of winning negotiators around the world have proven these methods.
Whether you do or don’t negotiate should be strictly up to you and based on three questions you ask yourself:
1. Am I comfortable negotiating in this particular situation?
2. Will negotiating meet my needs?
3. Is the amount of time and energy I spend worth the benefits that I can receive as a result of this negotiation?
Ford Motor Company Founder Henry Ford once said, “If you think you can or you can’t you’re always right.” This is the first crucial variable to negotiating.
Three crucial variables in negotiation are
1. Power – the power or capacity to get things done, to exercise control over events, situations, oneself.
2. Time – When does the losing Presidential candidate concede? If you have three months to write a paper for school, when are you most likely to write it? When you propose an ultimatum to a boss or client requesting more money, when are they most likely to grant your wish? At the final hour. When negotiating, we must understand the time constraints each party is under, present the options, select the negotiation style and remember that the concession will not likely occur until the deadline is near.
3. Information – Many people go into negotiations with a lack of information about the person or company they’re dealing with and without enough ammunition (information) to leverage in order to change someone’s thinking. A popular show right now is ABC’s Scandal starring Kerry Washington (Olivia Pope). What happens whenever Ms. Pope and “The Gladiators” get a new client? They gather appropriate information to prove their case.
Information is power. You can change someone’s mind and the outcome of your negotiation with enough information. On the bad side, this is called blackmail, but on the brighter more moral side, this is simply called doing your due diligence.
So how do you get what you want when negotiating?
1. Listen, and never know too much. Sometimes your apparent ignorance can actually change the balance of power. Admit that you don’t have all the answers; humanize yourself, and the person you’re negotiating with will be more receptive to your approach. Have you ever gone into a meeting with the sole purpose of gaining experience through a mentorship or opportunity to get close to the CEO? If you were to go into the meeting as a “know it all,” why would the CEO be inclined to let you in? But instead, if you’re approach is something like this: I really like your work and I have several questions about how you handled this case, can you tell me more? What will happen? …. Exactly what you want, you’ll get more information and leave a good impression as an ambitious and bright professional, and you’ll gain an ally.
2. Be willing to take calculated risks based on solid information, only if you believe you have the power to accomplish what is required. If you’re negotiating a deal to book an artist for a show, and the promoter tells you that he’s willing to work with you if you bring 100 people to the venue. But if not, you’ll have to pay $10 per missing person. You have to ask yourself are you willing to risk the $1,000 loss that could potentially occur if you don’t meet your end of the bargain and if you could reasonably pull the 100 people. Also, are this venue and this look for your artist even worth it? Who will be in the audience, what’s the exposure? If getting your artist on the show is important to you and you have the disposable income, you have your answer.
3. Exercise the Power of Commitment. Cohen recommends that the power of commitment and involving others should be applied to all of life’s situations when the outcome is uncertain. If a group of people believes that, “We’re all in this together,” each person will commit to making it a success. I call this the “Community Conglomerate Mentality,” and this is exactly why many of the programs that I plan for the community are never done in solitude and have partners. To me and other partners, programs like the 2013 Youth Resolution Project are worthy of the commitment.
4. Focus on fulfilling needs. To successfully interact with anyone in any situation, all you have to do is determine what his/her needs are and then fulfill them. This goes back to the information variable.
5. Ensure the person/group you’re negotiating with is invested in the encounter. If I spend two months speaking with a potential client, researching their needs, answering tons of questions via email or phone and thinking of how I can excel their company, then when the time is right, I present my price to them, let’s say it’s $1,000 a month. If they say, I can only afford $900, I have a few options: take it, leave it, or negotiate further. I’m more inclined to negotiate and even take the $900 if I’m invested into the situation. But if at the first phone call they tell me their needs, I tell them my price, and they say I can only afford $900, unless I want the client that badly, I may turn down the deal.
6. Ultimatums are always the last option. On page 43 of You Can Negotiate Anything, Cohen tells us that in order for an ultimatum to succeed, it must meet four criteria:
1) Frosting on the cake (the other side must have no other choice or have such an investment that they cannot just walk away from the deal. After you bake the cake, or build up your negotiation, you add the frosting).
2) Soft and palatable (the words you use must never belittle or offend the other side. Think “soft” ultimatum” stated as a statement of reality, i.e.: I understand your position, but this is all that I have,” versus “hard” ultimatums: take it or leave it).
3) A recipe that cannot be tampered with (quote official documents, “The policy states that we cannot give you a refund!” This happened to me this week, and I laughed inside, knowing exactly the negotiation tactic that was being used).
4) Selection from a limited menu (rather than leaving the other option with no alternatives, structure the situation to allow them to make the choice with one option obviously much more desirable to them compared to the other).
The ability to negotiate winning situations is a skill that can be used to create powerful movements for good. Although the terms “negotiate” and “power” have negative connotations sometimes, remember that these skills are absolutely necessary for anyone doing business or trying to create change. Check out the previous Sophisticated Sunday posts about Young, Philanthropic, Influencers, for examples of power and negotiation used for good.
In an upcoming issue I’ll discuss the various styles of negotiating. But please do yourself a favor and get your hands on a copy of You Can Negotiate Anything (Lyle Stuart edition, 1980 or Bantam edition, 1982.)
Natasha Brown is a writer and founding communications strategist of Think Brown INK, a creative think tank and strategic communications agency in the Washington area. Follow her on Twitter @NBrownINK or @TBINatasha or her company @ThinkBrownINK.